A few weeks ago, I was robbed at work. It was the second time it has happened to me. It came at an unfortunate time for me, as I was on a creative roll. In my emotional cycle, I am most creative when I am manic, and I was doing really well for a week or so leading up to the robbery. I had come up with many ideas, four different game ideas as well as starting on my children’s book. Life was looking up for me, it almost seemed like I had a chance to do something with my life.
Then it happened.
There is something about having a gun shoved in your face that can bring your mood down. I decided to quit my job at the store. Originally I was going to go to part time so I could work on my games, but that changed. I had had enough of that job. Besides getting robbed, every single night I have to deal with some random drunk in one way or another. Or I have to deal with some ass who thinks that he can do or say anything he wants to me because I work customer service.
If I teach you, the reader, anything, please let it be this: Treat service people with respect. Waiters, clerks, whoever. These people work for a living, just like you, they try to do their best, but they are human and can make mistakes, just like you. Calmly explain what is wrong and they will take care of it. Don’t start bitching, or complaining, just be nice. Also, keep in mind that everyone has rules they have to follow. If they say they can’t do something, except it and move on. Treat service people well and they will take care of you.
Sorry, I got sidetracked. This is about my lost creativity. I have stuck in my mind that to get out of my depression, I need to do something silly. Not sure why I have this idea, it never seems to work anyway. I need people to do silly things with, and I just don’t have that anymore. There was one person who I could always count on to do silly things with, but she has moved on with her life. So I struggle to try to get out of my funk on my own. My mistake seems to be that I keep distracting myself with movies, video games, ect. I need to force myself to be bored so my mind can wander. Of course, in my current mental state, that’s not working either. My mind only seems to go to dark places.
I wish I was one of those types who write or paint when they are sad or depressed, but I’m not. I need fun, excitement, silliness and things like that. I need friends for that.
Anyway, if anyone has seen my creativity, please mail it back to me. It might be next to my spontaneity.