The holidays are always a trying time of year for even the best of us, but being emotionally unstable can make them especially so.
It is no secret that I don’t like holidays, especially Christmas and Thanksgiving. They have mutated beyond what they were meant for and are simply commercial balls of crap. Halloween is the only one I like and it is one of the biggest commercial holidays, but it doesn’t try to hide it under layers of bullshit like the others. Buy costumes and candy and go have fun. No muss and no fuss.
This Halloween was a pretty crappy one. I have no one to blame but myself for this, but there it is. I’ve talked about the “family age” problem that I’ve run into, and that still holds true. My kids are too old and my friend’s kids are too young. I have no parties to go to, no friends to hang out with, no family to go bug. The one holiday where everyone else gets to act like me, and I can’t even participate. For the only party that I even heard of, I was asked to babysit. *sigh*
I get torn between two ways of looking at the holidays: Either spend them with family that doesn’t speak to me any other time of year and feel miserable, or stay home and feel bad that I’m not spending time with family. I would rather not celebrate either of the next two holidays, but I really can’t avoid it. They are EVERYWHERE. Seriously, try to find somewhere to go that isn’t draped in one decoration or another. I’d be perfectly happy spending the day at a bar having a drink with my wife, but we don’t do that.
On a side note: I really need someone to talk to, just normal conversation like a normal adult.
I’ve been trying to prepare myself mentally for the coming onslaught, but I’m sure it won’t matter. I will get depressed again, but at least I know that I’ve been doing really well the past few months so I should be able to make it to January.
Side Note 2: I’m really enjoying making props and thing. I’m getting better at it and learning a whole bunch. If I could find a way to make money at it, I would.
Let me know what is your least favorite holiday in the comments below.